by Beau Cadiyo
Frank Thorson sent me this article about yet another sandwich used in a violent assault.
In times like these, it is useful to remember two things:
1) If sandwiches are criminalized, only criminals will use sandwiches;
2) Sandwiches don't kill people - people kill people.
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2 comments:
Does this mean my lunch at work could be considered a deadly weapon upon more tham my health.
Company Policy state no weapons in the work place. WHAT'S A WORKING MAN TO DO.
Gary McElwain
Mr. McElwain -
You make an interesting point. The one link between these two stories that I can see is that in both instances the people involved were in apparently committed relationships. My immediate fear, upon realizing this, was that this would rule out sandwiches as potential date foods. Most people of a certain age (i.e., 17) know that pasta is a bad date food because of the potential to spill and/or stain clothing and/or splash. One also does not eat pasta at job interview meals. I'm not sure that there are any rules about sandwiches (and would be interested if anyone knows of one). On the one hand, sandwiches are easy, casual and highly personal; thus, they reveal a lot about a person, or about how a person wishes to be perceived by others. On the other, they ARE finger foods, sauces can drip and pieces of a sandwich (tomato, pickles or, as happened tonight to me, fish) can slip out if not properly gripped (a demonstrable skill in itself). It is also difficult to be expressive with one's hands when delicately pressing two moist slices of bread against the sides of a nice piece of warm meat - and, on a date, is it better to be expressive and communicative or to display manual dexterity? I suppose it depends on how well the date is going.
Back to your original question: what's a working man to do? In times like these, it is probably wise to seek the opinion of your office manager or, if possible, corporate counsel. Without commenting on your own position or ability, companies are laying off workers left and right, and, when making these decisions, they may just look for any reason to get rid of someone - i.e., violation of the weapons policy - rather than just tell the person, "We don't have room for you." Be careful, however, when approaching these people for opinions. They may be wary of someone asking for clarification of the weapons policy, and flag your personnel file as someone to be monitored more closely.
It is sad that things have gotten so bad that we even have to consider these issues.
Yours,
Beau
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